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What Summer With A Toddler Teaches You

By SEAN MARCUS

Published: Aug 20, 2007

I started pressing Jessica long before the summer started to let Beckett finger paint. She threw up every roadblock - he's too young; he puts everything in his mouth; he wouldn't know what to do with them anyway - but I persisted. We were close to halfway through the summer when she relented.

She was right on all counts. He had a good 10 minutes of gleefully smearing paint on the paper before realizing it could also go on his arms, legs and face. Every vain attempt he made to get paint out of his mouth led to more paint, more face rubbing and some pretty big tears.

There were some days this summer where my 17-month-old was more challenging than 150 of someone else's teenagers. I think I learned as much from my kid as he learned from me. And now it's back to teaching other people's kids during the day, trying to squeeze in my life lessons with my own son during the few hours before bedtime.

I'm keeping the summer memories, lessons and plenty of pictures from finger painting close by. I'm pretty sure they'll come in handy. After all, there are some striking similarities between my baby and my students.

I've learned that babies, like teenagers, don't focus well when they're hungry. I've learned that if you want them to do something, or not do something, you have to show them that you are willing to do it, or not do it, also. I've learned that they never seem to be paying attention, but they remember every gesture and word and gladly throw it back at you at the worst moments. I've learned that they are proud of what they can do even if they don't like to show off their intelligence, and I've learned that the best way to get them to clam up is to put them on the spot. I've learned that what worked yesterday won't necessarily work today. I've learned that it's OK if they whine and cry a little about something they don't want to do, but if I can hold out long enough, they'll still do it.

When I think about going back to school, my mind races to finger painting day with Beckett. Partly because it's the type summer activity that I'll miss so much, and partly because it's the biggest lesson I'll throw in my backpack and take to the classroom with me. Sure, it was risky to give Beckett a palette he'd never used before. He wasn't even all that successful with it on the first try. But it encapsulates the best parts of parenting and being a teacher: The more tools we give our children, the more we expose them to new experiences, the more we let them work with those tools to make something with their own hands, the more they learn. As long as I'm there to give the proper guidance, the mess is easy to clean up and well worth the experience of learning something new.

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Sean Marcus teaches journalism at Chamberlain High School. Keyword: Community columnists, to read other recent columns