Generosity Goes Around, Comes Back

By TOM JACKSON The Tampa Tribune

Published: Apr 20, 2008

DADE CITY - As a member of the well-entrenched Larkin clan of east Pasco County, Susan Douberley came naturally - indeed, eagerly - to the obligations of Southern hospitality. From small gestures to grand occasions, Larkin-Douberley (hereinafter, in deference to brevity and clarity, Susan) is known for striking precisely the right tone.

Her specialty, the public acknowledgement of gratitude, was never more evident than when she spearheaded the September 2005 benefit dinner for Josh Cooley, the Pasco deputy and Marine reservist desperately wounded in Iraq.

All of this serves as backdrop for the swirl of events that turned the tables of thankfulness on Susan and spouse Chad Douberley since Dec. 15. That night, surprised by an unexpected jog in a downtown Ocala street, Chad slammed their rented motorcycle into the curb.

The resulting spill launched Chad onto an adjacent lawn; Susan tumbled into the street, coming to rest in a lane of oncoming traffic. As for helmets, "Do we have to go there?" Susan protests. "I'm always the one insisting on them, but that night we weren't going very far, and we weren't going very fast."

From that instant forward, every increment of time assumed new importance for the popular pair who, until that moment, entertained visions of perpetual health and an eternity of happily-ever-aftering.

Today, four months after firefighters from Ocala Fire Station No. 1 dashed to the rescue of two presumed goners, the Douberleys are more than on the mend. They are practically competing to be the first declared fully recovered.

Credit the time-honored maxim, says Susan: What goes around, comes around.

In this case, what went around are two personal histories of devotion to their fellows. Susan, 45, tirelessly organizes benefits and tributes and hands out awards. Chad, 40, is a risk-accepting, life-preserving firefighter for Pasco Fire Rescue.

The resultant coming around began in the seconds after the crash with the alert response of witnesses; continued minutes later with the heroic efforts of Ocala's first responders; and kept rolling in the days, weeks and months that followed when relatives, friends and mere acquaintances practically clambered over each other for the honor of helping shoulder the load.

"It's a small community with a huge heart," Susan says. "They step up when someone is in need."

Exhibit A is the March 7 benefit dinner remarkably like the one for Josh Cooley, staged at the National Guard Armory; organized by public defender Tom Hanlon, banker Ralph Cumbee and principal Steve Cox; made possible by the volunteer efforts of Dade City Rotarians and Kiwanians; and attended by virtually every ambulatory resident within a 5-mile radius.

Studying Life's Hard Lessons

The Douberleys resisted initially. Says Susan, "Hey, we're the ones who do benefit dinners." But Hanlon was unrelenting, as only Hanlon can be. "You're doing this," he said. Now they're glad they went along, for a variety of reasons.

As a newcomer to the school district - she became a Centennial Middle School guidance counselor just last summer - Susan had compiled next to no sick leave, and was able to return to part-time work only in February, and then only because of the loan of a motorized scooter. Chad, only recently returned to light duty, endures a lingering injury to his right eye for which the top regional specialist is a Miami doctor outside his insurance network.

Renewed Devotion

Proceeds from the dinner provide cushion and opportunity as well as a salutary psychological benefit: Allowing themselves to accept the generosity of others, veteran givers Susan and Chad have progressed from chagrin to zealous gratitude.

Barely a day goes by that Susan doesn't drop another packet of thank-you notes in the mail. For errand-runners, meal-fetchers, chauffeur services, hand-holding, son-shuttling, ear-lending and who knows how many other kindnesses.

Pondering what to write is part of noodling out the reasons for why things happen. For instance: Is it possible to embrace faith and still want to give the Almighty a good talking-to? We'll leave that one to the trained theologians among us.

A more immediate question may be this: Is gratitude, sincerely expressed, enough? Pinning that one down may be the growth lesson in all of this, particularly for a couple who have spent their adulthood saying to others, "Why, you're absolutely welcome."

Maybe, just maybe, life on the receiving end will grant the wisdom to appreciate more fully their own legacy of generosity.

Tom Jackson can be reached at (813) 948-4219.